Growing kids have growing needs. And when we parents don't get what they need, they start throw out what parents most scared of (well, at least for me)- the mega tantrum. Honestly, I am a mother who cannot stand tantrum, I mean I don't know how to deal with it. I am not a calm person. Yes, I never slap or do any physical punishment to my girls. But instead, I like to say things that is not harmony like "I don't like it!", "Mummy paling tak suka you girls buat macam ni." Sometimes, I simply give them silent treatment, which is of course not good either.
There are lots of books and websites on how to deal with children's emotions. I can summarize up that all we need is to 'Keep Calm'. Obviously I need to exercise more on that. Here I'd like to share Aisyah's reading, which she got from this book. I've tried a few times when I was calm. Trust me, it worked! Once when Iris missed her cat at Nek Ma's house she cried so bad:
Iris: Mummy, Iris rindu sangat kat cat Iris. Boleh tak kita balik rumah Nek Ma sekarang jugak?
Me: Iris rindu sangat ke? Iris rasa macam nak peluk cat Iris ke? (I was thinking of saying 'Rumah Nek Ma jauh-lah Iris, susah kita nak balik.)
Iris: Ye, Iris rasa macam nak peluk.
Me: Iris peluk bantal ni dulu. Mesti cat Iris dapat rasa Iris peluk dia.
Iris: Dia dapat rasa ke Mummy?
Me: Dapat. Sebab kita rindu sangat. Kalau kita rindu sangat-sangat kat cat, cat pun akan rindu sangat-sangat kat kita.
And then she hugged the pillow and stopped crying. Then I thought, all we need to do is think like a children and get into their story. They have clean and pure thoughts, they think that all things can happen, it's like magic. So, we parents have that magic wands. Make it believable. O Allah, give me and Firdaus and all parents out there the calmness and magic!
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