Bapak started to tell me the real story of Felda people while watching Bilut. I assumed he get the story from his late father. He told me how Felda people having the hardest time to get the trees grow but not money. He started to be Mahathir for the hundredth times and I just adore the resemblance. After a while, I have been so patriotic and I felt like waving the Jalur Gemilang and sing our national anthem, Negaraku. Seriously.
But we were not watching the movie to the end since Bapak was scheduled on-call on the next day. Before we slept I asked Bapak to snap a photo of us (yes, you and I) since it was quite a long time we were not on a glamour flash. With my favorite long John and baby tee, Bapak snap few photos of us. It was an ordinary night. I tucked your Bapak with his favorite blanket and there we went to slumber land. Seriously.
The two of us!
There went our night, with a small kick and tickle of you in my womb. I woke up at 2am for pee pee and went to sleep again. The wonderful story was actually begun at 5am when I felt something weird about myself. I wasn’t sure of what happened in my body. I wasn’t even sure whether I want to have a poo poo or what people say of a contraction. So I got up from the bed and walking to and fro in our living room. Honestly I wasn’t sure of what happened to me. But one thing for sure was now I fully understand the meaning of that Malay idiom – ‘macam kucing nak beranak’. Seriously.
Felt unsure of myself, I rouse up Bapak and told him what happened. And I didn’t expect that he woke up and have a quick shower and asked me to grab your’s and my stuff. And for the first time (after 10 years) Bapak asked me to wear kain sarong. It has been a dog’s age! The last time I wore sarong when I was a Farisian. Oh what a community! Seriously!
Bapak was really a calm man. He is trained to be that way. With a calm morning zephyr, we went to the hospital. And from that moment I know that this is the time! I cannot lie to myself that I have a little pain in my stomach and luckily Bapak knew what he should do, “She tarik nafas pelan-pelan, and then hembus.” The method eased me a little bit if not much. And at that particular moment also I want to be a medical doctor. Seriously.
We arrived at the hospital at 6am and the houseman checked your heart beat and the jalan you are going to use to come out to this wonderful world. The houseman said that the jalan was only opened at about 3cm and most probably I would be delivering you the next day. After the checked up, the nurses brought me to the ward and Bapak went back home to take all his stuff since that day was his working day. We were left alone. And I felt the pain even more and I can say it was three times in ten minutes. I wish Bapak were there holding my hands. The pain was even worse when they put on numbers of stupid wires on my abdomen. I phoned your grandmother, Nek Ma and requested her to pray for us and I also called up Bapak to come quickly to the hospital. Bapak said he was reciting Surah Maryam and will come to the hospital as soon as possible. I even asked him to not finish the Surah since I cannot bear with the pain. I wasn’t sure whether I have been a drama queen or I was seriously in pain. Seriously.
At 8.30am I ordered the nurses to put off all the stupid wires on me and bring me to the labor room. They said they cannot bring me to the labor room since my jalan was still opened at 3cm. I said I know my body and please bring me to the labor room now! I know they hate me but I know my body better. So there we went to the labor room at about 8.45am but they do not put off the stupid wires on my body. Feeling like one of the patients in E.R., they put me on the stretcher and push me to the labor room. In there, I have to wear the blue dress and now I seriously felt like one of the House’s patients. Dr. Quizzi, one of Bapak’s friends checked the jalan again and he said I have to wait until it is opened for 8cm since now it was only 5cm. Bapak wasn’t there at that moment since he was in Surgical Operation Theater entertaining other sick patient. Oh Allah, how I wish he were there holding my hands. But fortunately, they provided me with a nice tranquil nurse who held my hand like she would never let go. I have been a drama queen for a hundred times asking for the most powerful drug on earth for laboring-The Epidural. Honestly speaking, I already told Bapak about my plan for laboring; it was either undergoing C-section or having The Epidural. I never thought of laboring you in normal labor. Seriously.
I asked the doctor to drug me since I cannot tolerate with the ache. I felt like the doctors and the nurses were trying to not giving me the drug since they kept on telling me that I have to wait for the anesthetic doctor to prescribe me with that drug. Feeling abandoned, I called up Bapak and asked him to pager up anesthetic doctor to run to the labor room and drug me NOW! Bapak immediately came to rescue me and pager up his colleague in Anesthetic Department and they promised to come ASAP right after their morning round. It was 9.30am and Bapak went in and out from the labor room since his pager kept on beeping. I cannot request him to be with me all the time since he had several minor operations to handle. So I relied on the nice nurse who held my right hand. And I didn’t give up on requesting the drug from that nurse and she asked me to keep on praying. To show that I had been abandoned by the government service, so I made up several screams, but they showed me no fear. Not even when I threat them with the title of spouse’s to Dr Muhammad Firdaus Bin Abas, the Medical Officer of Surgical Department, they didn’t show me a bit of fear. Oh, what a drama queeeeennn!!! Seriously.
At exactly 10.00am, Bapak told the second on-called doctor to handle his operations for a while until I’m giving birth. He was there holding my left hand and keep on telling me to inhale and exhale slowly. He wiped off my sweat on my forehead with his hand and I cannot forget his look in his eyes. That was the sweetest moment ever in my life being a wife to a great man-Dr Muhammad Firdaus Bin Abas, yes he is a doctor. At 10.35am, I felt like you were on your way out to this world. I screamed as loud as I can (but yet still can manage the poise of me) and saying that this is the time! And I can see everybody was running to rescue me; there were two doctors, Dr Norliza and Dr Quizzi, and four nurses and my sweetheart. I cannot tell exactly what it felt. I felt like something big was going to explode in my stomach. I was bearing down at exactly 10.40am. And everybody kept on giving me instructions.
Dr Norliza: Okay bagus, push Nurul push! Bagus! Pandai! Push lagi! Haa, pandai pun! Saya akan assist awak.
Dr Quizzi: Okay, tarik nafas! Push lagi! Sikit lagi Nurul!
Nurse 1: Okay, jangan jerit di mulut! Nanti penat! (See, I was a screamer!)
Nurse 2: Bagus! Bagus! Lagi!! Ha, tak payah guna Epidural pun!
I was so confused who to listen to. There were so many instructions and faces to look for. So I listened to my only doctor, my beloved husband.
My very own midwife: Okay She. Kalau rasa nak keluar, teran. Kalau tak,
simpan nafas. Okay bagus sayang, sikit lagi!
And the process went smoothly.
My very own midwife: Allahuakbar She! Sikit lagi! Allahuakbar!
And listening to Allah’s name, I questioned myself: Am I dying?
My personal doctor
And at precisely 10.54am, everybody was screaming “Bagus Nurul! Bagus! Awak dah berjaya!” (The line “Awak dah berjaya” is author’s overstate statement to add flavor to the story). But the best screaming was actually your screaming! I heard your voice and I cried like a err... drama queen? No, like a real mother. Bapak immediately iqamah and tears streamed down my face and no words to describe my feeling at that particular moment. Seriously.
And there you are, a cute little girl. The doctor put you on my body and once again I cried like a mother. You are so small but there are so much big loves waiting for you. They brought you somewhere else to give you your first bath. I heard you cried when they showered you. I know you were kind of afraid of the outside the womb world, but I promise you that this world is not as cruel as you think it is. (Do you think it’s cruel?). Here is the picture of you on your first bath.
Your first shower
After taking your first bath, Bapak brought you to me and for the first time you had your meal from my tiny little twins. Your mouth is so small relative to the twins. I cried again seeing two most loved people on earth being so closed to me. Bapak took you again to have your first rest on the real world with your other tiny friends. And there started my third pain-the suturing session. Gosh, it was a real pain (but how on earth I still can phoned up my families and relatives while the doctor is suturing?) and here is the ranking for the pain: [1] the contraction, [2] the suturing session and [3] the labor. Honestly speaking I want to have lots and lots of babies since the labor was not so painful compared to the contraction and the suturing session. Seriously.
After that, we were brought to the post-natal ward and had our first rest after a wonderful journey while waiting for the families and friends to chin us up. So here is the serious story of us-the day you were born. It was such a wonderful moment ever and I cannot portray it in real words. Seriously.
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